When I was pregnant with Bean I knew I wanted to breastfeed for at least a year. The more I learned the more I wanted to feed so I said I’ll go for 2 years. When he finally hit 2 years old I decided to just go with the flow and see how things played out. Well I didn’t think that stopping the would be so emotional, especially when he’s a toddler!!
About a month ago I started to experience a lot of pain when Bean nursed. For some reason we were not able to get positioned right or something and his teeth seemed to be digging into my nipple no matter what we tried. Our breastfeeding relationship was no longer working. For a while I just felt bad because I actually enjoyed breastfeeding my toddler, especially when my boys got to bond at the breast on many occasions. But when the pain became unbearable I knew we had to make a change. He was nursing mostly at night ad that was the most challenging especially since I was also nursing Sprout as well. So we tried to wean, I would talk to him about stopping and try to redirect his attention or offer a message or explain that the milk was for the baby or that it was painful. At times some of this worked but for the most part it didn’t. So I hit up a few of my friends and a couple of mommy groups of Facebook and I was lead to Dr. Jay Gordon’s night weaning method.
Ok here’s a link to what I followed for the most part. http://drjaygordon.com/attachment/sleeppattern.html
But I added a couple of dinner conversations with Bean (27m) about being a big brother and not wanting to hurt mom. So I would put Sprout (3mo) to sleep first and make sure I could give Bean my undivided attention. Thank God Sprout sleeps through anything. I did the first 3 nights exactly as suggested. And his cries were not as bad as I was expecting (I probably would have just given in had they been). Following that I have not been nursing Bean to sleep (only because it hurts) instead we pray, read, count toes in bed and just cuddle. There have been fewer tantrums than I expected and I usually just rub his legs or arms and tell him I love him and remind him that the milk is for baby brother. When he wakes up instead of picking him up I just cuddle him and talk gently and he rolls over most of the time. I’ve also allowed him to cuddle with his brother which I was scared to do at first but it works for us.
To my surprise I felt a little guilty for not being able to bear feeding him when he was ready for a nap or bed. I would just get through the times he needed to nurse because he was hurt or not feeling well. I had to appreciate that nursing is indeed a relationship between mother and child and sometimes these relationships have to change 😒. Now Bean is ok with helping me get Sprout latched on and tells me when baby brother needs “best (his version of breast) milk”. It’s been almost 2 months now and Bean’s only asked to nurse twice after falling and of course I gave in and he was good after about 2minutes.